When I wrote the title: "Girl Talk," I rolled my eyes.
I've always been closer with the guys. Maybe it's because I have an older brother and no sisters? Maybe it's because I don't really like chicks? I'm not entirely sure why but I've always found it easier to chill with the dudes than get gussied up with the ladies. Don't get me wrong, I've got some of the world's best girlfriends but I can literally count the number of them on one hand. I'm not what you'd call a girls girl. I'm scared of girls. Girls are mean, catty, mostly selfish, and hard to get along with.
Well, that's what I've thought all these years.
Recently, I learned something new. I learned that all the things I'd previously thought about chicks was mostly wrong. I mean, there are definitely still lots of females that may fall into the unfortunate categories I outlined above but they would also fall under the category of plain old lousy humans. I can't keep blaming some bad female behavior on the whole bunch. Sadly, based on past experiences, I had established a really strong line of personal defense which included rarely trying to make new female friends. It was a defense mechanism for sure, but ultimately, I think that I ended up hurting myself the most.
Serious food for thought: just when you think you've figured yourself out, it is possible to uncover new truths about you. Yes, even you. Be open, explore, and investigate the deep crannies of yourself that you always chalk up to; I've always been this way, or I'm just not into that, or I know I don't like this or that. In other words, let yourself get a little uncomfortable. Put yourself out there. Get out of your own way.
Those things, they're our habitual patterns, barriers, even walls that we create to make ourselves more comfortable. We insulate ourselves in order to protect ourselves from change, from the uncomfortable, from the new. BUT we were designed to evolve, to change, to live in a state of flux. I'm learning that instead of remaining stagnate in my comfortable insulated bubble that it's waaaay more rewarding to ride the wave of life.
Is it scary? Hell yes. Is it worth it? Abso-fucking-lutely.
I was recently invited to join a group of badass chicks to work together to read a book. The plan: work together, support, encourage and navigate the creative path that this book lays before it's reader. At first I jumped to my old standby, "Nope, a group of girls? I'm out!" But, for whatever reason, I was intrigued. I didn't immediately respond. I was interested and I wasn't exactly sure how to proceed. I eventually decided to get out of my own damn way and see what would happen if I took the plunge. Reassuring myself that the worst thing that could happen was maybe realizing it wasn't for me. That didn't seem so bad.
As it turns out, joining this lady group and reading this book are turning out to be a stellar decision. It's uncomfortable, it's hard, it's eyeopening and it is literally looking at my comfort zone and destroying it with laser beam eyes. It's all about growth. Personal growth that translates into living my best possible life.
Do yourself a favor and forget all those labels. You know the ones, some you created for yourself, some are leftover bullshit from childhood, from high school, maybe even last week. Ditch them. Throw them out the window and set yourself free. I know, I know, easier said then done. Maybe you're just at the stage of considering, and that's a great place to be. Where ever you are, how about considering that there is more. Whether you're a girls girl or a dudes dude, who in the hell cares? I know that I'm sick of what I always thought I was. When I realized that I didn't have to be any of those things, I allowed myself to discover a world of possibility.
In the last month, I've really shaken things up. I've realized more about myself surrounded by a group of girls I barely know, than I have in years. It's all about being ready, perfect timing, literally stars aligning for shifts like this to happen but the point is, it's possible. Anything is possible! When you surround yourself with amazing, strong, supportive, encouraging and inspiring humans it becomes a challenge to stay put. So whether or not it's embracing the feminist inside you, connecting with an artistic pursuit you deemed childish long ago, running for office, becoming a foster parent, whatever it is that's calling to you,
Make some waves or just ride them. As they say, there is no time like the present.
I'm where I am today because I joined a group of badass chicks to read a book. (I just rolled my eyes, again.) I mean, who knew that could be responsible for so much? I crept out of my comfort zone and what I discovered is so much more than I could have expected. Don't let yourself be confined or contained by how you feel something should or shouldn't be. You are entirely up to you, so why not shine?